finally I found strength I abandoned

, with benefit but

large much struggle. This is the only

thing: let it burden me. You

deserve my honesty, I cannot

allow for

your intense stare, it knows

me inside out. I could

never deny a thing, nor admit

to my want till that brief happy end, so even

now down widely echoing

hallways maybe is

my barren, reverberating reply.




Arms always in an open stance

prepared to hug

my teddy bear

sits quietly, awaiting my return.

Patient, he is never

unprepared to

offer me comfort.


Crossing your hands around

yourself, you are

purposefully preventing me from

showing my affection.

Purposefully you spurn me, tease

my heart.

You cut me to the core.

So you I leave,

to my teddy I go.

Poor teddy.

He’s a real man:

content to lie on the bed

or be tossed to the floor in fits

or sobbed and gasped into when I need to hide

my face, despaired.

No matter what I can return

to his embrace.





why do you spare grins choke gone your laughter rub away tears carefully save your smile for another day another feeling do I make you uncomfortable raising eyebrow in misamusement I tried to disarm but weakness you have none only perhaps over … Continue reading


The past works in the present.

It brings forward the mouth warming,

throat aching

scent of funnel cake

powdered sugar: mhm! everywhere

on my fingers, lips, cheeks… spills

down to my shirt, where

my mother doesn’t like it,

fried crumbs, melting, turning

your mouth into a sweltering summer day.

The past works in the present.

It pulls around ancient hearts sighing,

blood breaking

beat of solid drum

pouring toward: oh!! anywhere

pushing thunderclouds… this

hideaway in the mountains, where

we’ve frozen in time until

sorrow passes, hearing, yearning

for a peaceful, sweltering summer day.

The past works in the present.

Suggests that we change our course,

that though the stars sing in sync,

our souls don’t.

maybe they’ve become icy solid.

and maybe we don’t mind, but we

should, the memories shouldn’t bring

us shame, but pure happiness.

Hint , emphasize, suggest.

The past works in the present.